Positive Masculinity

Today is Father's day in the US. Fatherhood sure is changing- and not a minute too soon. I keep noticing how much my children benefit from spending time with their dad, and what a sense of safety that bond instills in them. Those of you who know me, know that I"m a proponent of adopting in the US a mentality similar to that of many European countries- creating a society that prioritizes family time over excessive work-time, and that emphasizes a balance between work and play.

It doesn't seem reasonable to me that when a man's child is born, that man is expected to go right back to work and leave the child-rearing to the mother. Well, at least for the few weeks of maternity leave she has until she needs to pass on the child-rearing to the daycare workers. 

My husband is a hands-on dad. He might change our little girl's diapers wearing a face-mask because the smells get to him, and he sometimes assumes I brushed our son's teeth, so he doesn't brush them- but all in all he is a hands-on dad. 

My mom always smiles when she is holding our baby girl and my husband passes by and the baby tries to leap out of her hands and into her daddy's hands. "You reap what you sow", she says. And she's right! He spends quality time with her every single day- playing with her, making her dance, teaching her how to drum. Yet he also finds time each day to spend quality time with our son- riding a bike with him, playing soccer, building magnetile machines. And with our son he also reaps what he sows. 

It's all about our belief-systems and our patterns. If we believe that family time is a supreme value, we will manifest it in our own lives, and in society at large. We don't have to keep drinking the kool aid and buying into a system that keeps us working non-stop just to survive. We deserve to thrive, and our little ones deserve a mom and a dad that are present in their lives. Most of my female clients are working on issues around female empowerment, but many of my male clients are not even aware of the fact that their lives could be so much more satisfying if they developed their paternal aspects more. 

So today we celebrate fatherhood and the wonderful contribution that positive masculine role-models make!